Shadows of My Past

Shadows of My Past

Shadows of my past are hauting me again
Feelings of despair are just pouring like rain
It feels like the hands of time have travelled back
Leaving me with hundreds of emotion that quietly attack

To be able to breathe freely again seems like a feat too great
But I am afraid to try, thinking that maybe its too late
If I could truly express myself and say what I want
I would erase the shadows that seem to haunt

But my confusing emotions still linger
Forcing me to acknowledge events I want to forget
I hoplessfly search the shadows
Still lost in feelings that turned shallow and left me upset

Although as I lose myself in memories I can't help myself
I beckon these shadows to return and help
Irnonically they keep me from losing my sanity
Even though in the end the encounter adds to my misery

It's such a frustrating dichotomy that leaves me torn
That my subconscious and I argue and later mourn
Because in the end its neither our fault
We fall short in a weak moment and submit to the feelings that assault

So it's pretty obvious that respite from the shadows is impossible
I myself brought on the pain and regard freedom as a wish too wistful
Still in the moments where the pain becomes too much to bear
I scream and cry for everything to disappear

I guess it's a never ending cycle that will only stop with time
I see myself missing major parts of life, and time I can't follow,
So in the end of all that pain and confusing solutions
It's sad to know how I hold on and can't let go.